WHAT ARE YOUR DREAMS?

DO WHAT YOU LOVE FOR A LIVING

Dear friends, What were your dreams when you were a child?

Did you dream of being a heroic firefighter? A famous singer? A President of your country? A great professional? A political figure? A social worker? Or a Scientist?

I just want you to Look back and see your life now!

What happened to those dreams? If you’re like most people, you were told how unrealistic your dreams were and you were encouraged to be more practical. “Get a real job/ course in college ” is the phrase many of us heard from parents, teachers and other authority figures in our lives. Sometimes they don't care about what is within you.

If you have buried those long-ago dreams so deeply in your subconscious mind that you can no longer even remember them, don’t despair! A little introspection can help bring them to the surface, but even if they remain hidden, there is one important thing to remember:

You are not the same person now that you were back then!

While it is possible to rekindle a dream you’ve held since childhood, you do not have to. Instead, let new dreams make themselves known to you. Ask yourself what type of work would make you feel most fulfilled. Ask yourself how you can best make a contribution to the world by doing something you truly love.

It sounds simple in theory, but how do you start? Many of us have fallen completely out of touch with our passions. We’re so focused on the things we HAVE to do that we have no time for play or exploration.

However – make sure your action steps are FOCUSED. Taking random action can be a good start sometimes (if nothing else, it can help build your confidence in what is within you), but ultimately you’ll be going in circles.

Instead, take a few minutes to identify the key steps that will create RESULTS. Think about the actions that will attract opportunities, get the attention of those in a position to help you focus on your dreams, and create steady progress.

Then keep up with this process, gradually increasing the size or magnitude of your steps. If you don’t see immediate results, don’t despair! Keep at it and in a very short period of time you should be feeling much more confident and eager to keep going.

Now, I’m going to be blunt with you: there is no other alternative but to MAKE time. Set aside some time to really get to know yourself. Figure out what you like to do, or explore new activities so you can decide whether they might be one of your true passions. You don’t have to devote dozens of hours to this, perhaps start with 30-60 minutes a day.

Thank you.

CHANGE YOUR POINT OF VIEW

ENJOY YOUR LIFE

"Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud, and one sees the stars."- Frederick Langbridge, A Cluster of Quiet Thoughts, If you have placed second in a writing contest, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again?

In life, we are always filled with choices. You may opt to have a pessimists view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take the optimistic route and take a challenging and fulfilling life.

SO WHY NURTURE AN OPTIMISTS POINT OF VIEW? AND WHY NOW?

Well, optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from societies.

On the other hand, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewife's disorder but also a teenager's disorder as well.

Here's how optimists are in action and researches that back up why it really pays to be an optimist:

OPTIMISTS EXPECT THE BEST

The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad events, which will last a long time and undermine everything they do, are their own fault.

The truth is optimists are confronted with the same hard knocks of this world. What differs is the way they explain their misfortune it is the opposite way. They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case.

Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. They use 'positive reinterpretation.' In other words, they most likely reinterpret a negative experience in a way that helps them learn and grow. Such people are unfazed by bad situation, they perceive it is a challenge and try harder.

They won't say things will never get better, If I failed once, it will happen again and if I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.

Positive expectancies of optimists also predict better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles.

PEOPLE RESPOND POSITIVELY TO OPTIMISTS

Optimists are proactive and less dependent on others for their happiness. They find no need to control or manipulate people. They usually draw people towards them. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with.

Optimism seems a socially desirable trait in all communities. Those who share optimism are generally accepted while those who spread gloom, panic and hysteria are treated unfavorably.

In life, these people often win elections; get voted most congenial and sought for advice.

WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUGH, OPTIMISTS GET TOUGHER

Optimists typically maintain higher levels of subjective well-being during times of stress than do people who are less optimistic. In contrast, pessimists are likely to react to stressful events by denying that they exist or by avoiding dealing with problems. Pessimists are more likely to quit trying when difficulties arise.

They persevere. They just don't give up easily, they are also known for their patience. Inching their way a step closer to that goal or elusive dream.

OPTIMISTS ARE HEALTHIER AND LIVE LONGER

Medical research has justified that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body's ability to fight disease.

Optimists health is unusually good. They age well, much freer than most people from the usual physical ills of middle age. And they get to outlive those prone to negative thoughts.

So why not be an optimist today? And think positively towards a more fulfilled life.

Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors?
Why not be resilient?
Like everybody else you are bound to hit lows sometimes but don't just stay there. Carry yourself out of the mud and improve your chances of getting back on the right track. And why not inspire others to remove their dark-colored glasses and see life in the bright side?

MAKING ROOM FOR WHAT YOU WANT

SACRIFICES

Sacrifice (like discipline) is one of those concepts that seems unappealing at first. We don’t like to “give up” anything – especially not for the fleeting hope that it might be replaced with something better at an undetermined time in the future. Where’s the fun in that?

Most of us yearn for the familiar and comfortable, even if it’s dissatisfying. It seems less scary to stay safely ensconced in our routines. We avoid taking the actions we know we must take to be successful, because it seems easier not to. We sit in a vegetative state in front of the television so we don’t have to think about how unhappy we are. And with each year that passes, we sink further into resignation.

I’m not going to ask you to give up the activities you love, such as watching television.

What I am going to do is ask you to consider what you would rather sacrifice. Either way, you are sacrificing SOMETHING. You are sacrificing your dreams as you hide your head in the sand, or you are sacrificing a portion of leisure time for a bigger goal.

Our perception of sacrifice is usually what makes it seem so unappealing. What can make it easier is a neat little trick I learned years ago: focus on what you are GAINING, not on what you are LOSING. It’s all about your perception!

If you think you have to be miserable now in order to be successful later, that’s exactly how you’ll end up feeling. If, on the other hand, you make a decision to feel happy about the changes you are making in your life, you will focus naturally on the benefits rather than the inconveniences.

The “inconveniences” DON’T have to be massive, by the way. Let’s use the television example again. You don’t have to sacrifice all of your television-watching in order to achieve your goals.

If you have a few favorite shows, by all means watch them! Recharging your mental and physical batteries with some downtime is just as important as working efficiently on your goals.

Again, the important thing is balance. Be willing to sacrifice what you don’t need for something you really need. Rather than focusing on what you’re giving up, focus on what you are gaining in the long run.

See success as something you need to incorporate into your life. If your life is already crammed full of unproductive activities and unsuccessful outcomes, you need to do a little housecleaning before success can effectively squeeze through your door.

Note: cleaning up your physical surroundings can also be effective in helping you let go of unproductive activities! Clutter (mental or physical) is a horrible drain on your energy. Get rid of what no longer serves you and you’ll be amazed at how much lighter and motivated you feel.

Thank you.

BE THE BEST!

SEVEN STEPS TO THE TOP

Lifelong personal development and the commitment to personal excellence require tremendous dedication, discipline, and willpower. The greatest payoff is that every time you learn and apply something new, your brain releases endorphin's, which make you feel happier and more excited about your future.

Every time you learn and apply something new, you will have a greater sense of personal power. Your self esteem, self-respect, and personal pride will increase. You will feel very much in control of your earning ability, which is one of the most important parts of your life.

In the next chapter, we’ll talk about the importance of courage, of overcoming the fears and doubts that hold most people back. It is often the case that we know what we need to do, but we lack the courage to take the risks that accompany trying anything new. Instead, we make excuses for inaction.

Here are the seven steps in the 100 percent formula:

Step 1: ARISE TWO HOURS BEFORE YOUR FIRST APPOINTMENT, OR BEFORE YOU HAVE TO BE AT WORK.

Invest the first hour in yourself by reading something educational, motivational, or spiritual. As Henry Ward Beecher once said, “The first hour is the rudder of the day.” When you get up and invest the first hour in yourself, you set yourself up mentally to have an excellent day. You will be more positive, alert, creative, and productive all day long when you start your day by investing the first hour in yourself.

If you read in your field one hour per day, that will translate into about one book per week. One book per week will translate into about fifty books per year. Since the average adult reads less than one nonfiction book per year, if you were to read fifty books in your field each year, do you think that would give you an edge in your profession? Do you think that it would move you ahead of virtually everyone else in your business? Of course it would!

If you read fifty books per year for ten years, this would be 500 books that would help you improve your productivity, performance, and income. At the very least, you would need a bigger house just to hold your books. And you would be able to afford it! 

Reading one hour per day in your field will make you a national authority in three to five years. This alone can give you your 100 percent increase over the course of your career.

STEP 2: REWRITE YOUR GOALS, EVERY DAY.

Get a spiral notebook and rewrite your major goals in the present tense every morning before you start out, without looking back at what you wrote the previous day. This writing and rewriting is the process of programming instructions into the guidance mechanism of your mind. When you rewrite your ten goals each morning, you will continually see and think of opportunities to achieve those goals all day long. You will become more focused, channeled, and directed. You will be more purposeful and determined. And you will achieve your goals much faster than if they were merely wishes floating around in the back of your mind. Writing and rewriting your goals each day can give you your 100 percent increase in income over ten years.

Step 3: PLAN EVERY DAY IN ADVANCE.

Make a list, and set priorities on your work before you start off. Your ability to set priorities and to choose the most important thing that you can be doing at every moment is the key to organizing your life and doubling your productivity. (We will talk in detail about time management techniques in Chapter 12.)
Working on your top priorities can increase your income by 100 percent over ten years, and it is probably impossible to achieve without it.

Step 4: DISCIPLINE YOURSELF TO CONCENTRATE SINGLE-MINDED ON ONE THING.

Choose the most important thing that you can do each day. Then, start on it first thing and then work on it until it is 100 percent complete. Your ability to focus and concentrate, when you develop and hone it into a habit, all by itself, will enable you to double your productivity, performance, and output in the next month and it will give you your 100 percent increase over ten years.

Step 5: LISTEN TO EDUCATIONAL AUDIO PROGRAMS IN YOUR CAR.

The average businessperson who drives spends 500- 1000 hours per year behind the wheel of a car. When you turn your car into a “university on wheels” or a “mobile classroom,” you get the educational equivalent of one to two full-time university semesters as you drive around.

Many people have gone from rags to riches, from average performance to excellent by simply listening to educational audio programs in their cars as they drive from place to place. You could do the same. This alone could give you your 100 percent increase.

Step 6: ASK TWO MAGIC QUESTIONS AFTER EVERY CALL OR EVENT.

First, ask yourself, “What did I do right?” Then, ask yourself, “What would I do differently?” The first question, “What did I do right?” forces you to think through and recall all the correct things that you did in that last meeting, presentation, or event, even if it was not successful. Write them down.

The second question, “What would I do differently?” forces you to think through all the different ways you could improve your performance in a similar situation. Write these ideas down as well. In both cases, by reviewing your performance, by thinking about what you did right and what you would do differently, you program yourself to perform even better the next time. This is one of the fastest and most powerful exercises in personal growth and development I have ever discovered. This process dramatically speeds up the rate at which you move into the top 20 percent.

Step 7: TREAT EVERY PERSON YOU MEET LIKE A MILLION-DOLLAR CUSTOMER.

Treat each person you meet and work with, both at home and in the office, as though he or she is the most important person in the world. When you treat people as if they are valuable and important, they will return the favor by treating you as if you are valuable and important as well. They will want to be associated with you, work for you, buy from you, and introduce you to their friends.

You begin treating people like million-dollar customers by starting at home, with the members of your family. Remember, they are the most important people in your life. So when you start your day well, first thing in the morning, by making the members of your family feel important and telling them that you love them, you will be more positive, relaxed, and happier for the rest of the day.

Fully 85 percent of your success will be determined by how much people like and respect you, especially in business and sales. Never miss an opportunity to treat people well. When you practice these seven steps each day for a month, you will see changes and improvements in your life, work, and income that will astonish you. After a month of regular practice, you will have formed a new habit of continuous personal improvement that can carry you onward and upward for the rest of your life.

Develop a stronger belief in yourself.

TRANSFORMING LIMITING BELIEFS INTO EMPOWERING BELIEFS

Dear Reader, what do you believe about your ability? What do you believe that you are best at? What also you do believe that is your setback? What are your actions? What are your Feelings?

Changing your existing beliefs is a simple process. The only thing you need is the determination to keep at it until it “clicks” in your mind. Do not say that it is impossible! Start and see the results. To start with, try these three steps:

1:Replace negative thoughts with positive ones.

While positive thinking alone will not alter your existing beliefs, it is a practice that can help you get in line with your thought patterns in a more conscious way. Rather than being a victim of your own thoughts, you can take control of them and choose them moment-to-moment. As you become aware of negative thoughts throughout the day, consciously replace them with equally positive (and usually opposite) thoughts.

For example, if you find yourself thinking that you’ll never be successful because you just can’t seem to break out of your limiting behaviors, consciously affirm that you have just as much potential to be successful as anyone else.

Visualize yourself with the determination, courage, and optimism you’ll need to succeed. And the next time negative thoughts arise in your mind, go through the same process again.

Remember that it is a process and it will take time to get into the habit of thinking positively, but it does begin to have an effect on how you feel on a regular basis. And the better you feel, the more positively you’ll think. You end up creating a continuous cycle of positive thoughts, positive feelings, positive beliefs, and positive actions!

2: Develop a stronger belief in yourself.

While you’re working on transforming the quality of your thoughts, you can also purposely develop a strong belief in yourself and your abilities. A good way to start is by making a list of your positive character traits, qualities, skills, and talents. Write down every positive thing you can come up with about yourself, even if you don’t think it’s that amazing.

Then simply spend some time every day reading this list and affirming your ability to accomplish whatever you set your mind to. Over time, you’ll begin to feel more positive about yourself and more confident about your abilities, just because you’ve developed the habit to do so.

3: Empower and motivate yourself.

Another wonderful tool for forming new beliefs is using your imagination to change your self-image. Visualization is an easy yet effective tool to replace your old, limiting self-image with an empowering new one. You simply close your eyes and conjure a mental image of yourself as you want to be.

Now, try these three tools and See yourself feeling confident, inspired, courageous, and successful. Before long, you’ll find that you won’t have to manufacture these feelings; you will feel this way nearly all the time – naturally! Again, this exercise is most effective if you do it every day, even for just a few minutes. I personally started by doing it for 15 minutes every day. Trust me you are going to transform your Beliefs.

KEEP NURTURING YOUR RELATIONSHIPS.

POWER THROUGH THE PEOPLE

Have you come across a person who is so naturally friendly that when you put him inside a room of strangers, he'll be friends with almost everyone in no time? We call such a people-person, someone unbelievably nice and charismatic that he can charm anyone into doing anything.

A socially-empowered person achieves so much greatness, basically because of the people that catapult him to success. He earns the trust and all-out support of the people, whom he had helped before. He never runs out of help. He can do anything with the plethora of people behind him. All because he knows he maximizes his social potential!

See, if you know your social skills and you make use of them, you will reach self-empowerment. Self-empowerment is making a general overhaul in your life and turning yourself into a happier and more successful person.If you can be one of those people-persons, then I can't see any reason why you will not succeed. You just have to know how to start.

1. BE GENUINE.

Hypocrisy will just bring you all the way down. Be genuinely nice and interested to people. Once they perceive that you are Mr. Hypocrite with selfish intentions, you might as well say goodbye to self-empowerment.

2. BE THE GREATEST LISTENER THAT YOU CAN BE.

To earn the love and trust of the people, listen to their problems and sympathize with them. Do not just hear them out, listen to them with your heart. Make eye contact when the person talks to you. Listen as if every word matters, and it does. Brownie points when they find out that there is a confidante in you. ( I think this is the most of the rewritten point in this Blog.) 

3. LAUGH OUT LOUD.

I do not mean that you force yourself to laugh for every joke cracked by someone, albeit you do not find it funny at all.This means finding humor in things and not being too darn serious. A person oozing with an awesome sense of humor attracts crowds and eventually, attracts success.

4. DON'T FORGET YOURSELF.

In the process of fluttering around like a social butterfly, you might forget yourself, allowing everyone to push you over. Remember, love and value yourself before anyone else. If you deem yourself respectable and worthy of affection, people will flock to you and not trample on you.

5. DO RANDOM ACTS OF KINDNESS.

Little acts of kindness matters the most, and this can be as simple as giving someone a surprise you-take-care card or helping an elderly cross the street. When I was a kindergarten student, kindness was taught to us and greatly practiced ( I guess in your school too). Now is the time to revive the good deeds and this time, let them stay for good.

6. CONTACT YOUR OLD FRIENDS.

Sad how some friendships are destined to goodbye, but thanks to technology, you can do something about it. Relive the good old days by flipping your year book and look for the great people whom you want to communicate with again. Adding these old friends to your roster of support peers will surely make you feel good all over. 

7. BE CONFIDENT.

Be able to stride to the other corner of the room and introduce yourself to people with that winning smile of yours. Just remember: be confident, not arrogant.

8. PRACTICE CONTROL.

When angry, don't snap at anyone. Never throw a tantrum. Stay calm and collected. Be adult enough to take control of situation and transform your anger into something more productive and passive. As soon as people think your anger goes to volcanic proportions easily, they will find it hard to come to you.

9. KEEP NURTURING YOUR RELATIONSHIPS.

Your relationship with your family, friends and significant others is too precious that you must not neglect it whatever happens. Go out and have fun with them. Do things together. Happiness will never fly from your side as long as the people who matter the most are close to you.

In the end, using people for self-empowerment means becoming a better and more lovable person. It's a win-win situation: the people know they can turn to you anytime and vice versa.

Reuben Koikai

LET THE WRONG ONES GO.

SAY LESS WHEN LESS MEANS MORE

Healthy relationships are accomplishments. They take commitment and work, and two people who are willing to meet in the middle and put in the necessary effort. People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.

If you’re in a relationship, intimate or platonic, Read and get some help.

1.  LET GO OF OLD WOUNDS THROUGH FORGIVENESS.

Every moment of your life you are either growing or dying, and when you are physically healthy, it’s a choice, not fate. The art of maintaining happiness in your life and relationships relies on the fine balancing act of holding on and letting go. Yes, sometimes people you trust (including yourself) will hurt you. Being hurt is something you can’t avoid, but being continuously miserable is always a choice. Forgiveness is the remedy. You have to let go of what’s behind you before you can grasp the goodness in front of you.

2.  COME CLEAN WHEN YOU MAKE A MISTAKE.

An honest heart is the beginning of everything that is right with this world. The most honorable people of all are not those who never make mistakes, but those who admit to them when they do, and then go on and do their best to right the wrongs they’ve made. In the end, being honest might not always win you a lot of friends and lovers, but it will always keep the right ones in your life.

3. STOP GOSSIPING AND START COMMUNICATING.

A good rule of thumb: If you can’t say it to their face, you shouldn’t say it behind their back. As one of the writers once said, “Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, and small minds discuss people.”  Life is much too short to waste talking about people, gossiping, and stirring up trouble that has no substance.  If you don’t know, ask. If you don’t agree, say so. If you don’t like it, speak up. But never judge people behind their back.

4.  GIVE OTHERS THE SPACE TO MAKE THEIR OWN DECISIONS.

Stop judging others by your own past. Never act, judge, or treat people like you know them better than they know themselves. They are living a different life than you are. What might be good for one person may not be good for another (experience). What might be bad for one person might change another person’s life for the better (Life is never static). Allow the people in your life to make their own mistakes and their own decisions.

5.  DO THINGS THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY.

If you want to awaken happiness in any of your relationship, start by living a life that makes you happy and then radiate your happiness into your relationship. If you want to eliminate suffering in a relationship, start by eliminating the dark and negative parts of yourself, and then radiate your positivity into your relationship. Truly, the greatest power you have in this world is the power of your own self-transformation. All the positive change you seek in any relationship starts with the one in the mirror. Remember Happiness is a choice that requires effort at times.

6.  SHOW YOUR LOVED ONES YOUR KINDNESS IN SMALL WAYS EVERY DAY.

One of my best sayings is “No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted.”  Nothing could be closer to the truth. Always be kinder than necessary. You never know what someone is going through. Sometimes you have to be kind to someone, not because they’re being nice, but because you are. Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.

7.  SAY LESS WHEN LESS MEANS MORE.

It takes some courage to stand up and speak; it takes even more courage to open your mind and listen. Pay attention and be a good listener (I once wrote in my previous posts about the Discipline of listening). Your ears will never get you in trouble. The people in your life often need a listening ear more than they need a rambling voice.  And don’t listen with the intent to reply; hear what is being said with the intent to understand. You are as beautiful as the love you give, and you are as wise as the silence you leave behind.

8.  LET YOUR LOVE AND TRUST OVERPOWER YOUR FEAR.

You never lose by loving; you lose by holding back. No relationship is impossible until you refuse to give it a chance. Love means giving someone the chance to hurt you, but trusting them not to. Without this trust, a relationship cannot survive. You cannot just believe what you fear from others; you have to believe in the good faith of others. If you are ever going to have someone trust you, you must feel that you can trust them too.

9.  ACCEPT, DON’T EXPECT.

Unconditional acceptance is something we want, but rarely ever give out.  Remember, people never do anything that is out of character. They may do things that go against your expectations, but what people do reveals exactly who they are. Never force your expectations on people, other than the expectation that they will be exactly who they are. Who they are is not what they say or what you have come to expect, it is who they reveal themselves to be. Either you accept them as they are, or you move on without them.

10.  LET THE WRONG ONES GO.

Know your worth! When you give your time to someone who doesn’t respect you, you surrender pieces of your heart you will never get back. All failed relationships hurt, but losing someone who doesn’t appreciate and respect you is actually a gain, not a loss. Some people come into your life temporarily simply to teach you something. They come and they go and they make a difference. It’s perfectly okay that they’re not in your life anymore. You now have more time to focus on the relationships that truly matter. Some people come into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts and we are never ever the same.

Remember,  True friends are those who, when you make a fool of yourself, don't believe that this condition is permanent. This is to say even the healthiest relationships have small flaws.  Being too black and white about the quality and health of a relationship spells trouble.  Accept the fact that there will always be difficulties present, but you can still focus on the good.  Instead of constantly looking for signs of what’s not working in your relationship, what you need to do is look for signs of what is, and then use this as a solid foundation to build upon. True friends are those who, when you make a fool of yourself, don't believe that this condition is permanent.

Reuben Koikai.

THINGS YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW ABOUT LEADERSHIP

Much has been written about leadership: rules, pointers, styles, and biographies of inspiring leaders throughout world history. But there are certain leadership ideas that we young emerging leaders, ourselves fail to recognize and realize.

Here is a short list of things you thought you knew about leadership.

1. LEADERS COME IN DIFFERENT FLAVORS.

There are different types of leaders and you will probably encounter more than one type in your lifetime. Formal leaders are those we elect into positions or offices such as the senators, congressmen, and presidents of the local clubs. Informal leaders or those we look up to by virtue of their wisdom and experience such as in the case of the elders of a tribe, or our grandparents; or by virtue of their expertise and contribution on a given field such, Academics issues, economic matters, social issues and Society in general. Both formal and informal leaders practice a combination of leadership styles.

These are some few point of vies about leadership styles and flavors.

1. Lewin's three basic leadership styles
i.   Authoritative,
ii.  Participative,
iii. Delegative

2. Likert's four leadership styles Exploitive

i.   Authoritative,
ii.  Benevolent authoritative,
iii. Consultative,
iv. Participative

3. Goleman's six emotional leadership styles
i.   Visionary,
ii.  Coaching,

iii. Affiliative,
iv. Democratic,
v.  Pacesetting,
vi. Commanding.

2. LEADERSHIP IS A PROCESS OF BECOMING.

Although certain people seem to be born with innate leadership qualities, without the right environment and exposure, they may fail to develop their full potential. So like learning how to ride a bicycle, you can also learn how to become a leader and hone your leadership abilities. Knowledge on leadership theories and skills may be formally gained by enrolling in leadership seminars, workshops, and conferences. Daily interactions with people provide the opportunity to observe and practice leadership theories. Together, formal and informal learning will help you gain leadership attitudes, gain leadership insights, and thus furthering the cycle of learning. You do not become a leader in one day and just stop. Life-long learning is important in becoming a good leader for each day brings new experiences that put your knowledge, skills, and attitude to a test.

3. LEADERSHIP STARTS WITH YOU.

The best way to develop leadership qualities is to apply it to your own life. As an adage goes action speaks louder than words. Leaders are always in the limelight. Keep in mind that your credibility as a leader depends much on your actions: your interaction with your family, friends, and co-workers; your way of managing your personal and organizational responsibilities; and even the way you talk with the newspaper vendor across the street. Repeated actions become habits. Habits in turn form a person's character. Steven Covey's book entitled 7 Habits of Highly Effective People provides good insights on how you can achieve personal leadership.

4. LEADERSHIP IS SHARED

Leadership is not the sole responsibility of one person, but rather a shared responsibility among members of an emerging team. A leader belongs to a group. Each member has responsibilities to fulfill. Formal leadership positions are merely added responsibilities aside from their responsibilities as members of the team. Effective leadership requires members to do their share of work. Starting as a mere group of individuals, members and leaders work towards the formation of an effective team. In this light, social interaction plays a major role in leadership. To learn how to work together requires a great deal of trust between and among leaders and members of an emerging team. Trust is built upon actions and not merely on words. When mutual respect exists, trust is fostered and confidence is built.

Now that you are reminded of these things, keep in mind that there are always ideas that we think we already know; concepts we take for granted, but are actually the most useful insights on leadership.

Thank you.

TALENT IS ONLY THE STARTING POINT

Identifying and Nurturing Your Talents.

I believe that every person is born with talents ! But Do you know your talents? How and what are you doing to keep going with your talents?

Dear Reader, There are two kinds of talent, man-made talent and God-given talent. With man-made talent you have to work very hard. With God-given talent, you just touch it up once in a while. The truth is that all of us attain the greatest success and happiness possible in this life whenever we use our native capacities to their greatest extent.

A good place to start is by gaining a clear idea of your skills and talents. Make a list of the things you are naturally good at, as well as the things you’ve become good at through repetitive effort. Write down the skills you use in your job, the things you learned in school, and the things you enjoy doing in your spare time.

When you’ve listed everything you can, look over your list and consider whether any of these skills and talents might be marketable. How can you use your talents to provide something of value to others?

Take your time with this exercise Seriously, don’t rush through it. You’re trying to get an idea of the work that would make you feel passionate and fulfilled – therefore it deserves your undivided attention. This exercise is also important for another reason. Your dream is NOT just about you. It’s about all the lives you will touch when you do what you were meant to do on this planet. It took me along time to understand that by holding myself back I was denying others something special I had to share with them. And I don’t mean that as a boast.

We are each special and unique(following my previous post on Falling in love with your uniqueness), and we each have something to offer this world that no one else does. By denying our own talents, we deny others the gift of what we have to share.So please, don’t skimp on this exercise. You owe it to yourself and others to be ruthlessly honest about your passion(s).

Once you have a clear list of your existing skills and talents, make a check mark next to the ones you use on a regular basis, whether in your work or personal time. Can any of those skills be enhanced or strengthened? Can you enroll in a continuing education course to expand on any of your skills? Make notes about possible opportunities to grow and develop what you already have.

Note: if any of the skills on your list are not things you truly ENJOY doing, cross them off the list and do not consider them as career candidates. That doesn’t mean you’ll never use those skills, just that they won’t be your main focus. A good example might be bookkeeping or accounting skills that you use in your day job. You may be good with numbers but if working with them doesn’t thrill you and move you, you should simply consider it an additional tool that can help with your work.

What’s left on your list? Look at the talents that were not checked as something you use frequently. Would you like to spend more time developing those talents? Again, if they don’t thrill you, cross them off the list. If they do interest you, consider ways to expand and develop them further.

Finally, make one more list: of things you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t yet. These will be things you can explore gradually and see if they have potential to be your passion. Then, be sure to MAKE TIME to explore them! Check out courses and classes in your local area, or do a few internet searches for groups of like-minded people. Give your interests a chance, and one (or more) of them might blossom into a life-changing passion.

Ordinary people think that talent must be always on its own level and that it arises every morning like the sun, rested and refreshed, ready to draw from the same storehouse - always open, always full, always abundant - new treasures that it will heap up on those of the day before; such people are unaware that, as in the case of all mortal things, talent has its increase and decrease, and that independently of the career it takes, like everything that breathes... it undergoes all the accidents of health, of sickness, and of the dispositions of the soul - its gaiety or its sadness. As with our perishable flesh. talent is obliged constantly to keep guard over itself, to combat, and to keep perpetually on the alert amid the obstacles that witness the exercise of its singular power. Talent is commonly developed at the expense of character.

Thank you.

'RELATIONSHIP' = 'SMART COMMUNICATION'

Most of peoples relationships do collapse because of poor communication skills that people do have. You are your own witness on how you communicate to other people, how you value them, how you care and give time to them.

Now! I want you to develop your relationship by communicating smartly.

1. Give Respect 

Give respect to everyone. Sometimes, a simple smile from you can make the entire day of someone. Never forget to thank any person who done something small for you, or your friend. Give a bright smile to your colleagues as well as the others around you. You would start feeling the change from the next day itself. When you are happy, the world will also be happy for you. Moreover, when you respect someone, you are in least danger of hurting him/her and there is the score for you. So, stick to this motto and see the world changing around you.

2. Be Sympathetic

We, as human beings, are given the power of understanding and if we don't integrate it in our life, how can we expect to justify our humane side. Everyone wants sympathy, especially when he/she has gone through a really bad phase in life. Don't you love it when your friend sympathizes with your grilling schedule at work, college,home or else where? So, don't be a miser for words and let people know that you care.

3. Humor Mechanism

Everyone likes funny people. Integrate humor in your life and try to search the sunny - side up in everything. You would soon find the ultimate secret of being happy. Tell jokes, poke harmless fun, and see the gloomy mood changing in an instant. However, refrain from sarcasm, as only a few of us can really pull it off without hurting someone's feeling. Stick to light humor instead.

4. Be Confident

For sweet talking, being sympathetic alone is not enough. You also need confidence. Don't let yourself be cast out as too mellow or pushover, as the world will start using you then. Be a confident and levelheaded person, who knows what he/she is doing. Make sure the world knows it too. Don't give anyone a chance to take advantage of you or typecasting you a patsy or a softy.

5. Flirt A Little

A little flattery never hurts! Be the first one to notice the positive change in a person and compliment on it. For instance, if your colleague is donning a new shirt, don't forget to shower an admiring compliment on him/her. Congratulate your colleagues on successfully finishing a project. A little flirting with your client can help seal your success. However, never ever give a cheap remark or go over the top in flattery.

6. Be Spontaneous

Whenever you say something, make sure that it doesn't look like a prepared speech or something well thought of (in advance). It should come out in a spontaneous manner, giving a genuine appearance to your words. If you are a serious person, who doesn't talk much, it's time for you to open up. You can practice with your friends and family members and then employ it elsewhere too.

Doing all these can help you to strengthen your relationship with your family, friends and society at large.

ANY QUESTIONS!?

THERE IS NO TRY, ONLY DO

Hello friend of Koikai, To succeed at anything you must develop a Success Mindset. If you have ever wondered why two people with the exact same circumstances and with identical goals don’t get the same results, you know that there must be something less obvious that contributed to the success of one and the failure of the other.

Adopting a success mindset is the determining factor which makes the difference between success and failure, regardless of other circumstances.

We often think of failure as the inability to accomplish a certain objective. We give it our best shot and the results are less than favorable. We’ve failed.

Ah, but does that have to be the end of the story? No! We ca n consider it a failure ONLY if we stop trying after we experience the less than favorable result. If we keep working at it, we might turn a “failure” into a success! Do yourself a favor and change your definition of failure right now. Here is my new definition of failure:

''Not having a plan, not working a plan, and giving up too soon.''

Think of any great achievement in history, and you can be certain that the achiever had to attempt it more than once, sometimes hundreds of times! If you’ve “failed” at anything in the past, be honest with yourself:

-how many times did you try?

-Did you give it a halfhearted effort and then give up when it seemed too hard?

-Did you let yourself become intimidated by challenges, or disempowered by negative comments from friends and colleagues and family?

Though you may believe that it was out of your hands, it’s important to understand something: You made a choice to fail. You gave up. You stopped trying. It doesn’t matter what the reasons were, even though they may have seemed perfectly logical at the time. The fact is, you allowed external conditions to erode your motivation and determination, and you threw in the towel.

You may resist this idea because let’s face it; it’s not a comfortable thing to hear. But this painful little insight comes with some good news! If you made the choice to fail, you can also make the choice to succeed. Whether you decide to pick up an old dream and dust it off or choose an exciting new path to travel, the outcome is within your control!

With the right attitude, focused action steps and a solemn vow to never give up, success will be yours. Don’t approach your goals with an attitude of “try,” only an attitude of DO! That little gem by the fictional character of Yoda actually holds a tremendous amount of wisdom.

Let me tell you the secret that has led me to my goal. My strength lies solely in my tenacity.

“Trying” means you are not going to give it your all. It means you will keep going until the going gets too tough. It means you are giving yourself an out in case you grow weary of the battle. It means you are giving yourself permission to surrender to mediocrity.

“Doing” means that failure is not an option. It means that you vow to give every ounce of blood, sweat and tears you have available because you believe in your dreams that much. It means that you cannot and will not accept defeat because the stakes are too high. It means that you are willing to work as long and as hard as necessary to achieve the outcome you desire, even if it takes years.

This is your life and you must decide that there is no going back, no giving up, no giving in – NO MATTER WHAT!